Two years ago, “House of the Dragon,” the highly anticipated prequel to “Game of Thrones,” captivated audiences worldwide. With season 2 set to premiere on June 16 this year, excitement is once again building. During the “Game of Thrones” era, Emilia Clarke’s portrayal of the silver-haired Khaleesi was immensely popular. However, the spotlight has now shifted to Emma D’Arcy, who plays the older version of Princess Rhaenyra Targaryen in “House of the Dragon.” This role is D’Arcy’s most significant to date, and their performance has already garnered Golden Globe nominations. Despite receiving widespread praise for their acting and a breakthrough performance in “House of the Dragon,” Emma D’Arcy has continually been misgendered by being referred to as “she” or “her.” This misgendering persists even though it is well-known within the fandom that D’Arcy is non-binary and has clearly communicated the importance of using the correct pronouns. It also highlights the importance of pronouns in the workplace.
The media and public’s failure to respect D’Arcy’s identity is just one of many instances that highlight the ongoing challenges faced by non-binary individuals and others with diverse gender identities in gaining recognition and respect for their preferences.
Importance of pronouns in the workplace: Why pronouns matter in an inclusive workplace
Pronouns are basically words like ‘I,’ ‘me,’ ‘you,’ ‘she,’ ‘he,’ and ‘they’ that help us refer to ourselves and others. We often use gendered pronouns such as she, her, he, and him in daily conversations when talking about other people. But when we only use he or she, aren’t we just assuming the person in question is either male or female? These assumptions, based on names or appearances, can negatively impact trans, non-binary, and gender-diverse individuals.
The conventional use of “he/she” suggests that gender is strictly male or female, but in reality, gender is a spectrum. People may identify as male, female, non-binary, genderqueer, genderfluid, or in many other ways. Currently, about 1 in 4 LGBTQ+ youth use pronouns that don’t conform to the traditional gender binary. Recognising and respecting these pronouns is essential for supporting diverse gender identities and an inclusive society.
Transgender people need identity documents to access basic civil rights, such as voting, education, inheritance, health services, and public services. However, obtaining this essential proof of identity with their correct name and pronouns is often extremely difficult for them. Many policies and identity documentation lack standards that allow citizens to choose a legally recognised third gender. Even under the best circumstances, they often face situations where linking their former and current legal names becomes necessary.
Journalists frequently misrepresent or misunderstand trans issues. They often misgender individuals, misinterpret trans rights issues, and rarely interview trans or non-binary people to gather their perspectives. Being misgendered by a widely read or viewed news source is not only emotionally draining but also a clear example of poor journalism.
To be a better ally, normalise sharing correct pronouns, challenge the media’s gender-specific language, and respectfully ask for people’s pronouns. The media often unintentionally uses gendered language, but small changes can help. For instance, using “their” instead of “his/hers” and “partner” instead of assuming gender can make the language more inclusive.
Why they/them?
The reasons for choosing they/them pronouns are primarily personal. Some people use them because they don’t identify with a specific gender. Others adopt them as a form of protest against traditional gender expectations, preferring to live outside these rigid constraints. For them, being gender nonconforming, including in their pronoun usage, is a vital part of their identity.
How can “they/them” pronouns work for just one person? While “they” typically refers to multiple people, it also serves as a singular pronoun. In English, we often use “they” when we don’t know someone’s gender or when we want our language to be inclusive of all genders. For instance, if someone leaves their book behind, we might say, “Someone left their book. I hope they come back for it.”
We are not inventing new words or grammar rules. Instead, we’re following established linguistic practices. Major dictionaries like the Oxford English Dictionary and Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary have acknowledged the grammatical correctness of the singular “they” for many years.
While they/them pronouns are gender-neutral, they are not exclusively nonbinary. Nonbinary individuals might choose not to use they/them pronouns for various reasons, just as people who are not nonbinary might prefer them. Gender identity is deeply personal and unique to each person.
Some people use mixed pronoun pairs, such as they/he, she/they, or even he/she/they. This choice often reflects a desire to express both gendered and gender-neutral aspects of their identity. Gender-fluid people might also select different pronouns at different times to reflect their changing sense of self.
Respecting pronouns is important in every workplace.
Building an inclusive workplace requires time and effort, and a vital part of this is respecting pronouns. Using the correct pronouns creates a sense of respect and belonging, which is essential for a supportive and inclusive work environment. Many people who are heterosexual and cisgender may not understand the importance of using correct pronouns, especially if they have never experienced being misgendered. For people who identify as transgender, non-binary, or gender nonconforming, pronouns make a big difference.
A large part of society assumes that if someone is not a woman, they must be a man and, therefore, should use male pronouns. However, that’s not always the case. You can’t always tell what someone’s gender pronouns are by looking at them, and assumptions might not be correct.
Referring to people by their chosen name and pronouns is an essential aspect of respect and courtesy. In any environment, especially the workplace, it is essential to honour each employee’s self-identified name and pronouns. This practice fosters a respectful and inclusive atmosphere for everyone.
It is up to you to share your pronouns at work. However, if someone deliberately uses the wrong pronouns to hurt others, the company must take action. Repeatedly using incorrect pronouns after someone has shared their preferences creates a hostile and unpleasant work culture.
Importance of correct pronouns in the workplace: What can workplaces do?
Here is what workplaces should consider doing:
Respect their names
Respecting names is something that seems to come up from time to time: not respecting someone’s correct name. Sometimes, you might accidentally use the wrong pronouns or a dead name. It’s okay if it’s a mistake as long as you make an effort to correct yourself. A person’s “preferred” name is the one they have given themselves before, during, or after their transition or coming out. It’s not just a simple preference or a nickname; it’s their identity.
Include gender pronouns in email signatures and work profiles.
While it doesn’t need to be a formal policy, companies should encourage staff to add their pronouns in email signatures and on platforms like Slack or LinkedIn. However, it’s important to respect each person’s choice about whether or not to share their pronouns. Everyone should have the autonomy to decide if they want to include their pronouns in their email signature.
Nobody is under obligation to come out.
It is never okay to out a trans person. They may want to keep their transgender status private in their workplace, even if they are openly trans in some other settings. No one else has the right to disclose this information. Regardless of how obvious it might seem, only they have the right to share that part of their identity.
Make a conscious effort.
Do not wait for a perfect date to focus on diversity, equity, and inclusion training. Sure, many organisations invest in this type of training during Pride Month, but there’s no better time to start than now.
Importance of correct pronouns in the workplace: The final thoughts
Misgendering, whether intentional or not, can create a hostile work environment. While some may brush off mistakes with jokes, these remarks can actually belittle someone’s identity. Simple actions like including pronouns in email signatures and discussing their importance can make a big difference. Respecting someone’s chosen name and pronouns is about acknowledging their identity and making them feel valued.
Disclaimer: The views expressed in this article are based on the writer’s insights, supported by data and resources available both online and offline, as applicable. Changeincontent.com is committed to promoting inclusivity across all forms of content, which we define broadly to include media, policies, law, and history—encompassing all elements that influence the lives of women and genderqueer individuals. Our goal is to promote understanding and advocate for comprehensive inclusivity.
